By Gil Somers
One could guess that social media, as implied by the name, has an impact on our relationships. But how? Research in the field has mixed findings.
Social Media and Belonging
Social media offers teens a way to interact and communicate with their peers, and allows them to feel a sense of group belonging. Psychologists have identified six characteristics that define friendship – intimacy, validation, companionship, instrumental support, conflict, and conflict resolution (Angelini et al., 2022). High quality friendships (like those that meet these characteristics) become increasingly important in middle adolescence as young people start spending more time with their peers, and those relationships become “more supportive and psychologically relevant” (Angelini et al., 2022, p. 26017). However, these core characteristics do not have to be limited to in-person friendships.
Research shows that these core characteristics of offline friendships can also be met in online friendships through social media. In other words, the valuable aspects of a high quality friendship can be found in online friendships. Furthermore, not only can online friendships be just as valid as in-person friendships, social media can help adolescents maintain their friendships, either when physical distance changes, or when it can be difficult to meet face-to-face, such as when daily schedules are different. Social media also allows teens (and the rest of us) to share thoughts and feelings in real time with peers, getting crucial feedback and validation from them.
In addition, teens can use social media to make friends with those who share similar interests with them, but may lack the physical proximity or safety to meet in like minded groups. This can be especially beneficial for marginalized communities, such as LGBTQ+, where teens may not be able to communicate with those around them about these things. Social Media also gives teens from these marginalized communities opportunities to voice their opinion and engage with societal issues, allowing them to be advocates, activists, or allies.
The Stress of Keeping Up
However, while Social Media can help teens form and maintain friendships, its ubiquitousness can be overwhelming for teens. This story from Time reports on a study that interviewed teens on the positives and negatives of growing up in a super-socially-networked world. According to the article, teens care deeply about what their peers are doing and saying, and keeping up with that in a world where social networking is everywhere can be stressful. This echoes what some teens said in the workshop we co-hosted with Light House Studio. The teens we worked with reported saying that sometimes they feel pressure to engage with social media and current trends to keep up with their friend group: they “had to get a phone because [their] friends had phones.”
Potential Risks of Online Friendships
However, there are also risks to online relationships. For example, teens should be wary of their presence online; not all actors are who they say they are, and some groups and/or individuals will try to take advantage of a teen’s feeling for a need to belong. Teens should also watch out for cyber-bullying and cyber-stalking, and be made aware of the permanence of social media. These risks are different from in-person interactions because social media allows others to present themselves more easily as someone they are not.
Social Comparison Theory
Finally, while social media can be beneficial to existing friendships, or help form new ones, teens (and the rest of us) should be aware of Social Comparison Theory. Social Comparison Theory discusses how we formulate opinions of ourselves (such as our self-worth) based on what we see in other people. This is especially important when it comes to social media because individuals are very much in control of what they show others. Essentially, people mostly only put their best days on social media, and this can make it seem like people only have good days. This makes it so that when we compare ourselves to others on social media, we may feel “less-than,” or as if everyone but us has it together. The truth is that everyone has bad days, and we can’t look to social media as a benchmark for ourselves.
This can also be pertinent when it comes to platforms that utilize a “liking” method. Teens can be more vulnerable to adults when it comes to view validation through getting a certain number of likes. One study from Western University in London found that teens can be vulnerable to jealousy through these “liking” systems, such as if their partner likes someone else’s photo, they may think that they are cheating on them, or plan to. Ultimately, social consequences seem more dire to young people, and they are more susceptible to negative effects of social media interactions in this same way.
